Learn to love your Inner Critic. Imagine that!
Image: Becoming Artist Yasmin Lambie-Simpson, She Spoke, 1st International Becoming Artist Exhibition, Prague, CZ
I remember being in art school and thinking to myself, “I must not be an artist.”
“Real artists” experienced art-making as an escape, as some kind of blissful, mythical “timeless state of consciousness.”
Right? Or so I thought based on what the artists around me were saying.
On the contrary, I felt tortured, desperate, and was facing demons that I didn’t know how to face.
My internal monologue insisted that I sucked, that art was a waste of time, that I couldn’t paint and that everything I did was shit.
My Inner Critic was out of control
The problem was that back then I didn’t have the awareness or the vocabulary to know that there was such a thing as an Inner Critic.
And I certainly didn’t have any idea that this critic, this most unwanted part of myself, could hold the key to my most authentic art.
Instead, I did what most of us would do when such an unpleasant, ugly, and nefarious voice rears its head: I tried to push it away.
The problem with doing this (advice that many creative people will give you), is two-fold:
1. It doesn’t go away. What we resist ALWAYS persists.
2. The Inner Critic can become a powerful ally in the creative process if we know how to listen.
Your Inner Critic Holds an Important Key to Your Most Authentic Art
Something powerful happens when you bring these voices out of the darkness and into the light.
I liken this to inviting these unwanted and unwelcome parts of ourselves in for tea.
When a door is opened and the rejected part of our psyche is invited in, we discover that these voices that
seemed so dangerous have been trying to protect us all along.
The distortion happened when the Inner Critic learned that we didn’t want its help, perceived it as the enemy and
banished it to distant corners of the psyche.
What do small children do when they need attention? Anything they can to get it.
Your Inner Critic will do the same.
Your Inner Critic Needs You and You Need It
There is a way to shift your relationship to your Inner Critic.
The process that I have used - the one that created bodies of authentic art, goes like this:
STEP 1: Stop Trying to Push Your Inner Critic Away
When I was in grad school, in the throes of being chastised by my Inner Critic, I did something that was a game-changer.
I created a space – a sanctuary if you will, for my Inner Critic and I to talk. I found a giant, wardrobe-sized box, set it up in my studio, cut a door in the side, and when the Inner Critic began its tirade I climbed inside with a big, fat Sharpie marker in hand.
Holed up in that box, I sat in the dark and scribbled on the walls until something started to shift.
I would eventually calm down, exit the box, and carry on. The effect was quite therapeutic.
The box became a physical reminder that when the Inner Critic started to speak
I needed to stop and listen - the opposite of pushing it away.
When we finally and fully acknowledge that the Inner Critic is there, something starts to shift.
I used a box; you can use a piece of paper or your journal. Throw a tantrum on the bed if need be – anything that helps you to acknowledge what is going on and let the energy move through you.
STEP 2: Listen to What Your Critic Has to Say
When I was inside of the box I engaged with the energy of the Inner Critic.
Once outside the box, I listened to what the Inner Critic was saying. When the Inner Critic said,
"What are you doing? Art making is a luxury. This is shit!" I wrote it down, verbatim, in a journal.
When it said, "This totally sucks, you don't know how to paint, and it's ugly," I wrote that down too.
Step 2 is to listen closely to what your Inner Critic has to say.
Keep a journal nearby.
Be an observer.
Be curious.
When you start to feel shitty, ask yourself: What is my Inner Critic saying?
More often than not, it’s a recurring monologue, repeating a similar set of allegations.
Once you can separate the critical voices from the other voices in your head you are ready to move on to Step 3.
STEP 3: Ask Your Critic to Guide You
Awareness is power.
When you know what your Inner Critic is saying, it becomes much less threatening.
It’s no longer just some dark, ominous voice coming from a hidden corner of your psyche, but a scared, hurting part of yourself that is acting like any scared, hurting part of yourself would.
The next step is to ask your Inner Critic to come out of hiding and invite it to become a part of your process.
This could look any number of ways. I gave mine a place on the canvas. I wrote the words it said directly down on the canvas. I included them in my art, trusting that once I gave them a proper role and a place of honour, things would change.
Later, I had conversations with the Critic in my journal.
I asked to see what it saw and trusted that it had my back.
By doing so, it became an ally, a voice of wisdom, support and even inspiration.
The Inner Critic became the key to my most powerful, authentic, creative voice.
It stopped robbing me of my power and instead, gave me my power back.
My Inner Critic taught me how to listen to myself.
Things start to change when we approach these parts of ourselves with intimacy, curiosity and tenderness.
Imagine how having a deeply nourishing relationship with all parts of your psyche would affect your art?
Any parts of ourselves that we resist, reject or push away will eventually create blocks in our psyche and in our creative system. Finding your voice and finding a consistent creative flow requires that you love and respect all parts of yourself. An artist’s work thrives in unexpected ways when they bring the totality of their experience to the work.
Nothing hidden. Nothing left behind.
It’s completely possible to have an incredible art career.
As an introvert. As a highly sensitive soul. As YOU.
There are only two things standing between you and a successful art career.
Find and eliminate these things and your art career will thrive.